Did you forget all the plans you made with me? Cause baby i didnt.

Its nights like these which got me thinking why i did all these in the past, and how much i regretted certain things that made my present. Well, sometimes i really wonder. Why, what if, will it be better? I have no clue.

I like the past, before everything collapsed during end of may. I hate it, i hated everything, i hated myself then. I'm not now.

But its nights like these that will get me back to thinking about those unpleasant thoughts, yet recapping my happy moments. Hmmmm, its nights like these that i miss you even more than usual. Nights like these that remind me of how much i love you still.

Dont you hate it when you see something you shouldnt have, and literally hear your heart crumble into a million pieces? That just happened, and i really cant stay strong for long. Swollen teary eyes on these nights again.

I wonder what you're doing, what you're thinking now? Well, not me for sure.

Make me assuredly yours.

Hi little bears. I feel like a mama bear, those big ones cause i'm really hungry and i wanna munch on some food. argh

Anyway, last saturday's service was awesome. But wednesday's one was the best outta the best! So wednesday, after training i practically chiong to take a bath and meet the peeps. Well, i wasnt the last the reach ahaha! Train to dhobby to meet dylan and co, before boarding the bus to east coast. Although it rained, but we prayed and the sun came back to life :) Sand castle building was fun, cause it was super retarded, plus there are unglam shots which luckily i'm not tagged in. HAH! The other group's sandcastles were mad beautiful! Oh, and i saw yile and caught up with her throughout the entire day! <3

The evening service was cool, i mean being able to speak in tongue was amazing. Hmmm dk how to describe it. The night concert was the best best best best! SHIOK MAN. Jumping around and singing like wild dinosaurs, the atmosphere was superb! Went to eat touhua with huiling, huiming, berlin and debbie. Oh and gabriel and dk who dk who, ahahaha sorry i'm still in the process of making new friends. Well, we played some card games, crazy night :) Cabbed home past midnight! Oh goshhhy, sorry mum!

Saturday's service was different, met debbie and ben for mac breakfast. Oh ya, cassandra came toooooooo! :3 Oh ya, i wasted alot of money that day. Cause i cab, and ate mac and stuff liddat. So after service, i got no money to get home. Luckily javien told me to cab to her place there and she help me pay. WOW SO NICE SIA! (Shock shock) hahahaha, thanks la! Ate dinner at hougang mall with ber and jav. Been sucha long time since i went there, kinda miss it. Hmmmm

Met up with bballers on sunday at vivo! Hahahahahaha, went to meet yuxuan and ber for shepherd teaching, which was rather interesting! Hahahahaha new knowledge new knowledge. Thanks, although she's not my official shepherd yet, i'm a lost sheep now. Hohoho :3 Ate and studied a little, before heading to glacious to meet jav and eat my favvvvvv yogurtttttt (<3)

Met xiaoting at around 2plus then mrt to meet juniors and coach at habourfront. Hahahah, shop around and juniors bought new bball shoes! :D They went off with coach while me xiaoting and jav went around vivo. Hahahaha gongcha was awesome, love the milktea! :D Actually i love all milkteas, yummmmmmmmmmmy~ Went to nex to meet ber for dinner, ate kfc laaaaaaaaaa omgomgomg. Did some shopping at popular, oh ya i bought a new cute water bottle. Got robots, which are oh so adorable hehe.

Okay, i should be starting on homework. Anyway, school started out pretty fine. I'm feeling a little sick, okay i need to lie down, update again real soon. Bye lovelies

That should be me, making you laugh.

I dont know why i'm here, i got that feel to blog but i have no topic to talk about. Hmmmm weird start of the day for me. Anyway, i should be bathing and on my way to dhobby by now if not i'll be late. OMG

I'm pretty hyped up about praise and worship later, hope my blisters wouldnt stop me from jumping up and down and up and down. Hehehehehehehe, i'm a hungry broken bird now. :( $$$$$ come to me!

Oh so paper thin.

I feel worthless, but i want to be with you.
I dont know why but i think we're meant to be,
do you feel the same?

Or maybe its better for you if i'm not that special one.
But i want to be. with. you.

Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?

Just leave me alone to die. Quoted by lilo.

No i cant fall asleep. I dont get why i need to put so much effort and bother so much. Then when you tell others, i become the bad guy, yet again. I want to complain too, but i guess complaining to others isnt much of a great help to me. Esp when its about you. Why am i caring so much about? Maybe cause its about the team, which i might not be a part of anymore, if i told the truth. Well, the truth hurts sometimes, literally it really does hurt a lot. Why do i get upset over just a little tiny matter? I guess its cause i'll keep thinking about it, and link to much more troubles. Hate it hate it hate it, i'm so weak so weak so weak.

K i'm no longer mad at you, i'm mad at myself. Seriously la, bang wall and die why am i so weak so weak so weak so weak why does it hurt so much so much. :(

I'm complaining about my life, when others out there in japan are suffering more than me. What a person i am, i hate myself. Why am i so weak so weak so weak so weak, i dont feel human anymore. Paralysed maybe, so weak so weak so weak.

Money cant buy us happiness.

Hello its beeen weeks since i posted right?

Well, i practically forgotten what happened, so i'm not gonna update about them fully. Sorry readers!

Anyway, first thing first. I joined yhope neb3, my first lg session was fun. Lovely cute people in the same lg as me, so its always a funny memory! <3 Oh, i'm pretty excited for my journey with God starting from now, cause i know i'll be blessed by Him, and hopefully i'll be a better person yea?

And also, march holidays has begun! But before that, we got back our CA1 results which i felt was pretty horrible. I failed my amaths, got VR for humanities, and only one A. Got 30plus/44 in class, and around 160plus in level. Hais deproved so much, feeeling so sad. But i got to keep that negative thinking aside and buck up after march holiday! You know i have high expectations of myself, the school expects a L1R5 of 6 for me you know! Everything A1, except chemistry A2 and higher chinese B3. Well, many says its possible. Okay, i'm gonna work towards that goal! JIAYOU :D

Trainings are getting tougher cause nationals are starting soon. I'm not sure what i should do, but oh well, i guess i'm gonna chiong for nationals then settle down rest, and study ba. Hopefully, i really want zhonghua to get into the next round. I want zhonghua to get into at least top8 in nationals! I really want that before i graduate, although its not up to me to decide our fate. But i'll just pray.

Anyway, i'm still unsure who's my shepherd, yuxuan/debbie/shontelle(if that's how i spell her name). But whoever it is, 请多多指教! <3 Hahahahahaha. Got to know a few church people, well its always great to make new friends right? Hahah got people say i v pretty, hehehehehe! And fiona said i'm photogenic hehehehe. Compliments are always so heart warming. I'm not gonna say people are pretty, i've decided to tell others that they have a beautiful soul instead. Seems meaningful huh? Awwww

First training yesterday and it practically killed me. Tired like some pig, muscleaches everywhere la! :( But i'll be fine after a couple days of rest. I'm fatfatfat already cause i ate 2 big bowls of glacious with debbie yesterday, with oreo toppings! Oh gosh :( Oh ya, i needa juggle much more stuff properly cause i have more things to do. I mean like, sometimes i'll be staying late with church peepos for basketball, so i needa prioritize my time well. I cant let having fun affect my studies! OLEVELS THIS YEAR LEH. Hmmmm

I spent the whole of today resting and watching tv, and feeling like a hungry bear cause my house has no yummy food :( There's training tmr too, and then some church stuff at the beach! OH GOSH IM EXCITED TO THE MAXXXXXXXXXXXXX! :> And i'll be able to see pohyile after like 3 years? Omgomgomg. Thank God for reuniting us. And maybe i'll see iris too! I'm so hyped up for this! EXCITED EXCITED HEHEHEH.

Okay, i needa go eat my dinner soon or else i'll munch on my sofa. Oppps, heheheh. Oh ya, more photos on facebook and twitter, i'm much more active over there. But i will try to update more often here k peepos! Well, you know i'll still love you, dear bloggy. Xoxoxo

But secretly she wanted him as well.

Hello peepoooo, I'm posting using my new iphone, for the first time. It's kinda time consuming to blog by typing on the iphone cause it's kinda slow. :( sooooo it's gonna be a very short update.

Well, as you can see, I got a new iphone and i have a super awesome blue cover! <3 hahahahahahahaha. Thanks daddy! So now my contacts are little and I need more numbers people! Please please please tell me soon k! Oh ya, my number changed so do check my fb for it. :)

Hmmmm, okay im feeling tired from today's training already, though we didn't do much. I got school early tmr and then service in the afternoon. I didn't actually know when I raised my hand, it means I have accepted god and joined their church. Okay, actually I have already accepted christ when I was in city harvest children, but oh well, yhope is fun too! Gotta mingle around with the lifegroup and get to know them better. Alright it's getting late, and gosh I'm feelin hungry again. Sassafras, well gnight lovelies.